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‘I nearly committed suicide’ - Ex- Super Eagles star reveals his greatest regret in football

Ex- Super Eagles star reveals his greatest regret in football
Former Super Eagles midfielder Etim Esin has opened up about the severe depression and drug abuse he suffered after being excluded from Nigeria's squad for the 1994 FIFA World Cup.
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Esin was left out of the 1994 World Cup list, and his teammates and the late goalkeeper Peter Rufai, who captained the team against Argentina, had enquired about his whereabouts during the tournament.

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Despite Esin's absence, the 1994 Super Eagles squad made a memorable debut at the tournament. 

They advanced from their group before being narrowly eliminated by Italy in the Round of 16, a performance still celebrated as one of Nigeria's finest World Cup campaigns.

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Esin opens up on World Cup snub

In a candid interview on the Play Zone Podcast, the former international star described the omission as the most significant regret of his career, a disappointment that led him to contemplate suicide.

"My greatest regret was not playing at the World Cup," Esin stated. "That led me to a lot of depression. I nearly committed suicide because I had a dream."

Etim Esin, former Super Eagles midfielder
Etim Esin, former Super Eagles midfielder

Esin explained that his hopes had been tied to representing Nigeria on the world's biggest football stage. 

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He also revealed an alleged promise from the late Moshood Kashimawo Olawale Abiola, who had reportedly assured him of a leadership role in the team.

"Abiola promised me, 'if I win the election, you will captain the team to the World Cup.' You know this life, in a split second, can just turn around. Abiola was locked up. The World Cup was the only dream I had," he added.

The pain of missing out was compounded by the recognition of his absence by his teammates. Esin recalled how the late goalkeeper Peter Rufai, who captained the team against Argentina, had inquired about his whereabouts during the tournament.

Etim Esin || Getty
Etim Esin || Getty

"Even the late Peter Rufai... asked where the African Maradona was," Esin said. "So, you can imagine how it was very painful for me at that time."

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The emotional turmoil ultimately pushed Esin down a destructive path as he struggled to cope with the heartbreak of not being part of a historic moment for Nigerian football.

"I could not believe that after the '90s, I would not also be part of the squad for the '94 World Cup," he confessed. "That’s why I went into drugs. I was so depressed that I went into drugs; I was taking cocaine."

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